Emor

The sicha for parshas Emor is in Vol. XXVII of Likkutei Sichos.

The Rebbe begins by saying that everything in Torah is a lesson and a teaching including also the names which we give the various parshas. This parsha is called Emor which means to say and although the sentence reads, “emor al hakohanim” “say to the kohanim” the parsha is not according to Jewish tradition called “emor al hakohanim” but it is called “emor” say.

The Rebbe asks, what is the lesson inherent in the word “emor”? Generally we find that speaking is not such a positive quality, as the Mishnah says, “emor me’at,” say little. If it is words of Torah that the speech is referring to, for this we don’t need a hidden message in the title of the parsha. The Torah says clearly “v’dibbarta bam” you should speak words of Torah.

So what kind of speech does emor refer to and what is it telling us in terms of how we are supposed to speak? The Rebbe explains that in the posuk in Tehillim it says, and the Midrash brings it in connection to “emor al hakohanim” that G-d’s sayings are tahor, pure, unlike the speech of a human being. For example a king promises his subjects who praise him that tomorrow he will build them everything that they need. But then the king goes to sleep and doesn’t wake up. What happens to his promises then?

G-d is not that way; rather He is Hashem Elokim Emes, the G-d of Truth. He is Elokim Chaim u’Melech Olam, a Living and Eternal King. And since Jews are also called chaim, living, by being connected to G-d, we too are living, it is understood that just G-d’s sayings are tahora, they are fulfilled, the same must be true also of Jews, that we can be trusted to fulfill what we say. And even more, since we are similar to G-d in some way, just as G-d’s words themselves have an affect, b’dvar Hashem shomayim nasu, that by G-d’s words the heavens were created, not that G-d says He will do and then He does, but the saying itself creates - G-d created the world by saying, there is a similar effect that a Jew has, particularly by tzaddikim, that what they say has an effect.

But what kind of speech are we talking about? The Midrash goes on to say that in the times of David, there were children who had not sinned and were able to understand and explain Torah in a very profound and deep way, and so David prayed for them that G-d should protect them. But because they spoke lashon hara, of talking bad about another person, when they grew up, they went to war and fell in battle. Lashon hara, the Midrash says, is a very destructive sin because it harms three people – the one who says the lashon hara, the one who hears it, and the one about whom the lashon hara is said.

From this we know that when the Midrash is referring to the word emor in this week’s parsha, it is talking about the kind of speech that is the exact opposite of lashon hara, particularly if that which is being said is true, because if it is a lie then it is called motzei shem rah, a different sin than lashon hara. So lashon hara is specifically if it is true. Therefore the opposite of lashon hara would be saying only complimentary qualities about another person, and in such a way that the compliment has an affect.

We will understand this from what the Rambam writes in Hilchos Deas about how a person should behave. In perek V, he writes that a talmid chocham is a type of a person who speaks only complimentarily about his friends, and doesn’t mention their faults at all. Later on in perek VI, he says that it is a mitzvah for every person to love every other Jew as himself, as it says, v’ahavta l’arecha kamocha, you should love your fellow Jew as yourself, and therefore it is necessary that a person should speak only complimentary about his friend.

What is it that the Rambam is saying in perek V, that a talmid chocham speaks only positively about others, when it would appear that this has no particular relevance to the talmid chocham? And why does he relate it to the talmid chocham, when he himself says in the very next perek VI that it is a mitzvah on every person, to have ahavas Israel, and therefore to speak only that which is complimentary about another Jew?

The difference is that he talking about two different virtues. In perek V he is talking about the qualities necessary to be a talmid chocham. A talmid chocham is different from the average person and the quality of his character is recognizable in all facets of life – the way he speaks and the way he walks and so on. So what is it that sets the talmid chocham apart in the way that he speaks? One way is that he speaks only positively about his friend and not the negative. Then the Rambam concludes concerning a person who behaves this way, the Torah says, that G-d takes pride in the behavior of a Jew. And since a talmid chocham does behave this way, the result is that everyone praises him, and loves him, and desires to do as he does, and this brings a kiddush Hashem.

Therefore in perek V Rambam is talking about a talmid chocham and how a talmid chocham behaves and the fact that he speaks positively about others is not for the benefit of the others, but as part of the completeness of his own personality as a talmid chocham. Then in perek VI, Rambam speaks about the mitzvah of loving a fellow Jew, and that is to do what is beneficial to your fellow, that a person is created as a social creature, and that you have to love your friends and treat them properly. He then goes on to say, therefore you should speak only positively about another and you have to protect his wealth and his money, just as you protect your own.

Hence the possible distinction between the fifth and the sixth perek, is whether you are talking about what is beneficial to others or what is beneficial for yourself to perfect yourself.

However this would not be a complete explanation because if in perek V the Rambam is speaking only about what is necessary for a talmid chocham to perfect himself and to raise himself to the highest and most admirable level, it wouldn’t be necessary then for the Rambam to say that a talmid chocham speaks positively about others and not negatively at all. Why is that necessary? And if it is necessary then it should be said first. It would make more sense to say a talmid chocham does not speak negatively about someone else, but rather speaks only positively.

This tells us that the Rambam is speaking about saying positive qualities concerning someone else, when that someone else could or even maybe should be criticized for his negative behavior. And that is why the Rambam says that even in such a case, the talmid chocham will speak positively and not negatively even when it would seem to be appropriate and necessary.

The Mishnah in Pirkei Avos says to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. What does this mean? It is talking about someone who is obviously not behaving the way he is supposed to behave. And that is why there is a question as to how to judge him and he needs the Mishnah to argue his case and tell us to give him the benefit of the doubt. So the talmid chocham who behaves and conducts himself according to Pirkei Avos, which is mila d’chassidussa, to go beyond the letter of the law, gives everyone the benefit of the doubt.

Now concerning the obligation to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, the Rambam adds a detail and says, when it comes to a talmid chocham who is giving the other person the benefit of the doubt, he speaks only in praise of the person, and does not criticize him at all. He speaks positively about another person even though he sees the faults that need to be criticized. He corrects the fault not by attacking the fault but by speaking positively and in that way correcting the fault to the point where it is completely eliminated and there is nothing left to say at all.

Now why is this only for a talmid chocham?

The Rambam says that a talmid chocham has to behave this way in order that people should be pleased his behavior, which creates a kiddush Hashem. Therefore the talmid chocham, more than anyone else, has to speak pleasantly with all people.

So here the talmid chocham is different than everyone else because when a person has a fault, we have the obligation to correct it by criticizing it if need be. Now by the talmid chocham, who has to be very careful that his behavior be a model of G-dly behavior, can’t criticize and correct a person’s faults directly, he has to always speak pleasantly. The average person doesn’t have this obligation, so he can on occasion and when it is appropriate and helpful, be critical. He can point out a person’s fault in order to get rid of that fault.

When the talmid chocham sees a fault in another and has to correct it, he has to find a pleasant way to do it. How does he do it? He does it by speaking positively and not negatively at all. And he does it in such a way that when he speaks positively about his friend, he is actually revealing the virtues the person has, and by revealing those virtues, he affects the person to where his faults that he had until then, fall away and are nullified.

The Gemarrah says concerning lashon hara that it has a negative effect on three people – the one who speaks it, the one who hears it and the one of whom it is being said. We can understand why the ones who hear and speak it are affected negatively because they are involved in a sin. But why should the person about whom it is said who is innocent, be affected by the lashon hara?

The answer is that one of the properties of speech is that it brings into revelation that which was hidden, because thought is hidden and speech is revealed. Therefore when we say something negative about another person, we harm him by bringing his faults into the revealed state. It is possible that a person should have a fault but it remains hidden – if he doesn’t act on it, it is not revealed in that person.

But when we speak of it and reveal it in our speech, then it brings that fault into the world of speech where until now it was only in the world of thought. And by bringing out into the world we activate it and that can have a negative effect on the person about whom it is being said.

The Alter Rebbe said about his teacher the Maggid that sometimes the Maggid would explain something in Torah that was beyond the understanding of his listeners. This enabled him to bring the thoughts into words and make it available in this world. In doing so, someone on the other side of the world could come up with that idea because it was already introduced by speech into the world. So we see that in the positive revealing an idea in Torah makes it available to others as well, also in the negative, we shouldn’t put into words that which we don’t want revealed or introduced into the world.

Since good is more powerful than evil, if when something negative is said about another person, it can have a detrimental affect, how much more so when we say positive things. When we speak about the virtues of another person and reveal that in our speech, it makes it easier for that person to actualize those very virtues within himself and act upon them. This brings out the goodness.

To take it a step further, Rambam says that the talmid chocham doesn’t speak negatively at all. What is the emphasis of “at all”? Rambam is teaching us that by a talmid chocham judging a person positively and giving him the benefit of the doubt, then in the end not only does he help bring out the strength and virtues in that person but it helps him completely eliminate his faults.

To understand this, we have to understand a little bit better what it means to give the person the benefit of the doubt.

In Tanya, the Alter Rebbe says that we shouldn’t judge another person until we have been in his place. Why? The place where a person is can influence him and cause him to sin. Since he has to make a living by being in the streets all the time, and he is overexposed to all sorts of negative influences, therefore it is very hard for him not to sin.

We see from this, giving the person the benefit of the doubt doesn’t mean that where there is the possibility that the person did something bad, you should give him the benefit of the doubt that he didn’t do it. Here the Alter Rebbe is saying something else: you know that he sinned. You are giving him the benefit of the doubt that had he not been exposed to this kind of a test, were his life not so difficult, he would not have sin. That is the benefit that you are attributing to him. This is a person who you know has done something wrong and yet you find where he is not guilty or punishable for his sin because it is the circumstances that made him do it.

And that is what we mean when we say that we should give the person the benefit of the doubt, the Hebrew word is “l’kaf zchus” you should judge a person meritorious. But when we say he is not guilty for his sin because the circumstances caused him to sin, that means that he is not punishable, but it doesn’t mean that he is meritorious. So what do we mean by “zchus”? So the Rebbe explains that when we judge a person and we say that he could have overcome the test that G-d put to him, G-d made him depend on his livelihood to be on the street corners and be exposed to all of these things, why did G-d do this to him? The fact that G-d would put him to such a test, and put him into such a negative circumstance, that proves that G-d had previously provided this person with certain merits and certain powers, which would enable him to overcome these test.

So even if in fact he is not overcoming it, it means only that this virtue, the merits that G-d gave him are not activated, he is not using the strengths that G-d gave him. So this giving him the benefit of the doubt means not that he is not guilty for his sin but that he has great virtue that has not yet been actualized which would have enabled him to pass the test and overcome all temptation.

And that is what the deeper meaning of always giving a person the benefit of the doubt. It means to bring out and help him actualize those virtues, the meritorious side of the person that G-d has given him that he hasn’t yet put to use.

And so the Rambam says that a talmid chocham judges every person meritoriously, gives him the benefit of the doubt, and speaks only positively about him, and not critical at all. A true talmid chocham who judges a person and gives him the benefit of the doubt will eventually change the negative aspects of the person into merits, because when he sees how G-d is testing the person, which means that the neshama has been given great powers to be able to pass these tests, and then he speaks about those great powers and potential that this person has, this completely eliminates the negative and the critical characteristics that had been there previously.

This is what it means that the name of the parsha is “emor”, telling us how we should speak: that there is a speech which is virtuous, which is not necessarily talking Torah, but it is talking about the virtues that a person has that enable him to live up to the expectations that G-d has of him.

And just as G-d’s words are effective in and of themselves, the same is true with these words when they are spoken the way of talmid chocham is supposed to speak - they have the effect of bringing out the hidden good.

This is connected also to another meaning of the word emor. The Gemarrah says that Moshe is being told that he should “ l’hazhir gedolim al hakatanim” say to the kohanim, and they in turn should say to someone else. The adult kohanim should pass on the message to the young kohanim. And l’hazhir means not only to warn, but also to illuminate from the word zohar, to make light. So the Torah is saying that in the chinuch, the teaching of a child, there are two ways: to criticize the negative, and to build up the positive.

In order to l’hazhir, to make it light, a chinuch that illuminates, that enlightens, the criticism has to be with the left hand, and the positive has to be with the right hand, the stronger hand.

So this is what it means by emor, and not daber. Emor is a soft speech, when you speak about the positive, and build up the positive, and daber is a harsh speech, when you criticize what is negative and try to discipline by criticism.

This is connected to the Rebbe Maharash, whose birthday comes out in these weeks, on the sefira of tiferes sh’b’teferes. The Rebbe Maharash said that the world says that you have to go under, and if you can’t go under, then you go over, but I say “l’chatchila ariber” you go over the problem right from the start.

One of the meanings of this is, that to go under means that you first attack what is at the bottom, meaning the negative, to clean up the undesirable behavior of a student, and then when you finish with that, you go over, then you deal with the virtues of the student. The Rebbe Maharash says, “l’chatchila ariber”, add goodness, focus on the good, focus on the positive and that will automatically take care of the negative.

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